So I arose and went out into the valley, and behold, the glory of the Lord stood there, like the glory that I had seen by the Chebar canal, and I fell on my face. But the Spirit entered into me and set me on my feet, and he spoke with me and said to me, “Go, shut yourself within your house. And you, O son of man, behold, cords will be placed upon you, and you shall be bound with them, so that you cannot go out among the people. And I will make your tongue cling to the roof of your mouth, so that you shall be mute and unable to reprove them, for they are a rebellious house. But when I speak with you, I will open your mouth, and you shall say to them, ‘Thus says the Lord God.’ He who will hear, let him hear; and he who will refuse to hear, let him refuse, for they are a rebellious house. -- Ezekiel 3:23-27
Most of the time, we are called to speak the truth in love. We are to [p]reach the word; be instant in season, out of season; reprove, rebuke, exhort with all longsuffering and doctrine. Nevertheless there may come a time when we are called to silence, when to speak out in condemnation of egregious evil runs counter to God's will. Sometimes rebellion, rather than prodding us to declaim, binds and mutes us. We are sent speechless into our cell. It hardly makes sense that Ezekiel would be tied up and not allowed to speak the truth, to admonish and teach those around him. Yet Jesus Himself said, Do not give dogs what is holy, and do not throw your pearls before pigs, lest they trample them underfoot and turn to attack you. We will set aside for now the idea that we might be persecuted for speaking the truth, though that is happening more and more. The truth should not be wasted. The word should be sown, not trampled and defiled. It not only does no good, it is often misused and abused by the ungodly. There really are those who cannot handle the truth and really have no business or right trying to handle it. How do you get a message to people who think they know it all?
A couple of days ago we were talking about Ezekiel being overwhelmed and being a source of consternation to the exiles. I don't think we'd need to extrapolate much to guess that Ezekiel might have seemed to have lost his mind. A modern diagnosis might be schizophrenia. Perhaps his fellow Jews thought him a danger to himself if not potentially to others. Ezekiel may have retreated to his house of his own accord, but it sounds very much like someone else went in and tied him up. He was unable to speak or to explain what was happening. It must have seemed pretty strange to everybody involved.
Like his nation, Ezekiel was in bondage. His apparent insanity was the cause. Sin was the cause of Jerusalem's fall and Judah's bondage. Their sin was the rejection of reality and the God of all truth in a sort of national insanity. Confined to his house, unable to express himself, tied down like an animal for slaughter, Ezekiel preached an eloquent message to those around him daily. It is doubtful that many received it. I wonder if Ezekiel, at the time, even understood what was happening to him? He wrote afterwards as he was able, when he understood that his life had been a sign. What was he thinking at the time?
It is a good witness to be strong and steady and faithful in the midst of trials, to trust God even when we hurt and don't understand. But none of us expect to be bereft of our senses, to get out of balance and become paranoid, obsessed, out of touch, or severely depressed. What kind of message is God offering through the old boy who thinks he has been abducted by aliens? What would we see if we watched the homeless guy in his worn field jacket with the idea that the Lord had something to do with him being where he is? What if our lives form symbols and speak in a language that goes far beyond our conscious understanding of what we are doing and what is being done to us? Could it be that loss and tragedy, derangement and disintegration, when seen at a tangent to our personal line of sight, is meant to speak to people, to convey truth to those know not enough to seek after it? If we are wrong to cast our pearls before swine, can we write a message with the husks on which they feed?
Everything isn't necessarily a sign, I don't suppose. Sometimes the brain-dead panhandler is just a loser -- maybe. Does the drunk ever look up from his gutter at some happy, successful citizen passing by on his way to work and think, "There, but for the grace of God, go I"? I don't know. My life seems pretty chaotic at times. I get beaten up badly some days to the point I just want to, as my mom used to say, crawl in a hole and pull it in after me. Someone watching me lose it, watching me beat on my desk in utter frustration after I have done something over for the twenty-seventh time, even as the people who have asked me to change it are asking why it isn't done yet -- they would be justified in wondering about my saintliness. But is it a part of a message the Lord is trying to send, a word, perhaps in a bigger message, or a letter in word? Do the drunk and the citizen, the panhandler and the desk-pounder, all this that seems so senseless in the moment fit together to form a picture that could be comprehended if one knew where to stand?
It could be. I don't think you can see it from orbit, but I suspect that the angels, out there in spiritual space can perceive it, at least catch glimpses of it, see enough to know it's part of a really good story. When we fall flat on our faces, are bound and mute, or are out of our heads in grief, pain, and confusion, one of them will come up and whisper, "It's not what you think. It is beautiful. Wait and see."
7 comments:
Do the drunk and the citizen, the panhandler and the desk-pounder, all this that seems so senseless in the moment fit together to form a picture that could be comprehended if one knew where to stand?
I believe so.
Good essay. Reminds me of this depressing/uplifting Richard Thompson song
What a Grace-infused pouring out!
Like one of those Bob posts where there is too much to comment on each piece yet each piece calls for it.
A couple comments:
I think everything is a sign, but that there is a hierarchy to them -- something like thinking there is a certain degree of meaning to each one. Why not. There seems to be hierarchy and order built in to everything else spiritual.
And, likewise, I am asked a lot to change things in the day job. But is it "asked" or is it "how it is asked" which effects me. It seems it is usually when the person is projecting something else with the request that injures. This is recieved as an injustice. If this is true then at least I benefit in recognizing the projection and of course I benefit from the knowledge in learning from what I did that wasn't right.. What benefit is there to the projector who doesn't know he is projecting? What about the times when I do it?
As Frankl said, it is the injustice which hurts most.
God does love drunks. That is depressing and uplifting -- kind of neat.
Hierarchy is a good word. I was think of a jigsaw puzzle but even in the that there is a hierarchy with the edge pieces. Defining the boundary is really important. I have to think about that.
I was joking with some of the people I have been doing stuff for. As you know, my business email is my first-name.last-name@xxxx.com. I told them I was going to have the company change it to bottle.neck@xxxx.com. That's the way I felt -- like I was the bottleneck for all these vital deliveries.
Also, two things that happened this week -- one before and one after really drove this Ezekiel idea home to me. I got word earlier in the week that one of my many cousins, we'll call him B., committed suicide. I saw him every week in Sunday School -- he's three years younger than I am so I didn't see him so much at school. He was always a practical joker, always clowning around. When he got older he was always getting drunk and stoned. Like many of my relatives, he grew up to be a truck driver.
Another cousin named Rick who is also a truck driver, rode with B. on a load out of New York City here a year or two ago. B. had gotten into some coke or something, and he was about half drunk, too. Rick said B. could hardly walk, but when he got behind the wheel, he just seemed to go on auto-pilot, and they went high-balling out of NYC and on down, I think he said, the New Jersey Turnpike. Rick said it was amazing and some of the best driving he had ever seen, period.
The thing afterward on Friday was my wife telling me about Randy Travis and some of the things he has been through. She talked about him being arrested drunk and naked outside a church. "Why," she said, "do you think he went to church?" In response, I basically told her what I had written here, and it made sense to her.
In the Philokalia there is a section on the different kinds of "Fools for Christ". Some know why they are doing the crazy stuff for Christ's sake. Some I believe do not know or give no sign that they know. They are "taken over". I often wonder if that's what happened to Mel Gibson when he went nuts for awhile after The Passion. That there was some sort of price to pay rather than a reward, or that the ground where he tread was no man's land; when a man stands there the demons are drawn out of the woodwork.
I also think some telos may take generations to play out. Like the equivalent of DNA on the spiritual plane. In other words, can it be possible that the meaning of your life is not revealed in your lifetime? I think there is some indication of this when God tells Abraham he will be the father of many nations. I've told my son when he has been up against it, that it may be helpful to think that your sons and daughters and theirs are rooting for you from the future.
Mel Gibson is another one, yes. The portrayal of Satan in The Passion was bound to stir something up.
In other words, can it be possible that the meaning of your life is not revealed in your lifetime?
Kind of like the guys who built the cathedrals over generations. There's a blueprint, and we may or may not know much about the overall plan. We add a few stones in our lifetime in accordance with the plan, but we can't really tell where it's going.
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