We nationalized education. We nationalized General Motors, Goldman Sachs, and AIG. Looks like we are going to nationalize health care. In the spirit of the times, I'd like to suggest that we nationalize legal services.
If a house, a mortgage, and free Viagra are rights, shouldn't we have the right to a free attorney? Why should wealthy people have the right to a better lawyer than a poor person? Of course, you have the right to public defender if accused of a crime, but to guarantee an OJ outcome, you need to have access to a free "dream team" including jury consultants.
I think it outrageous that trial lawyers in civil suits have a right to a percentage of the settlement. Lawyers and consultants should be paid by the government at fixed rates -- like doctors and hospitals under Medicare. This situation is truly unfair. People should not be able to opt out and hire private lawyers. Everyone should be treated equally.
And just think of the poor people who fall down in Wal-Mart and cannot afford a retainer. They contribute to the higher cost of legal services by being forced to hire an ambulance-chaser on a percentage basis. Something needs to be done.
Free legal services for all!
Now, I wonder why that bill has never been introduced in a lawyer-heavy Congress?
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5 comments:
"Free legal services for all!"
Your wish is my command.
However. There is one small catch.
There is no more law to argue about.
Enjoy your lawyers.
Okay. One big catch.
Kind of like no more medicine to practice. Good point.
And what about food? Food is a civil right. Big grocery is denying my...
Ah, screw it.
You know, I can't even get into making smart-ass comments tonight. I'm just gutsick.
JWM
Let 'em try to nationalize revolution.
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