The Hideout

Besides this you know the time, that the hour has come for you to wake from sleep. For salvation is nearer to us now than when we first believed.  The night is far gone; the day is at hand. So then let us cast off the works of darkness and put on the armor of light.  Let us walk properly as in the daytime, not in orgies and drunkenness, not in sexual immorality and sensuality, not in quarreling and jealousy.  But put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh, to gratify its desires. – Romans 13:11-14

Sometimes it is hard to believe that we have a choice.  Sometimes we feel compelled to do the wrong thing.  “I just snapped” as Mike Tyson famously pronounced after taking out a piece of Evander Holyfield’s ear.  I actually have some empathy for the Mike formerly known as Iron.  I got so frustrated the other day about something that I grabbed a floppy house shoe and beat the wall.  It made no sense whatsoever, but it got rid of some adrenaline, and I was calmer afterward.  Plus because I didn’t use my fist like I used to, I didn’t have to fix a hole.  I really need to break down and buy a heavy bag. 

The truth is, though, that we always have a choice.  Where our problem comes is that we do not always make the choice at the right point.  Once we start to go down the dead-end road or the one where the bridge is out, our choices are more limited and possibly more painful. 

The right decision is the one I can make in the light.  My mind has two sides.  No, not dumb and dumber, although I can understand where some folks might get that idea -- the light side and the dark side, or the flesh and the Spirit.  Perhaps the thing that confuses me is that there is not always a conflict between the two sides.  There are times when I want to do what I ought to do, or I ought to do what I want to do.  Everything is harmonious. 

Other times, I’d kind of like to slip something by over on the dark side.  My siblings are between thirteen and seventeen years older than I am.  I was probably still in grade school when I happened across a stash of my brother-in-law’s “men’s magazines” – nothing very extreme, Argosy and stuff like that, but they had different theme than Outdoor Life and Sports Afield.  I was reading one of the articles in the attic when my sister came up and caught me, almost.  I shoved the magazine under an old mattress.  She asked me what I was doing, and I made up some farfetched story which even she wasn’t dumb enough to believe.  I don’t know if I would have gotten in much trouble, but I didn’t want to find out.  Perhaps more importantly, and what I’m trying to get at is that I didn’t want to risk losing access to my dirty little secret.

I think that’s a lot of my problem with walking in the Spirit.  I don’t want to completely eliminate my access to the dark side.  I just want to be able to toy with it a little, mull it over, like Billy Ray Cyrus (it may take a while to get that one and all you'll do is groan).  Walking in the light twelve hours a day is not that hard.  I don’t even think walking in the light 23 hours and 45 minutes a day is too much for me to handle.  I just don’t want to give up that last fifteen minutes.  I want to keep a little old nature preserve, over there in the shadows. 

Hidden from Plain Sight

Therefore, don’t be afraid of them, since there is nothing covered that won’t be uncovered, and nothing hidden that won’t be made known – Matthew 10:26

The context here is that of Jesus warning His disciples that things may not always go smoothly for them. If people call your teacher a devil, what do you expect they’ll say about you? There is, however, no reason to be afraid of them since you do not have to answer to them. They may kill us, but they cannot damn us. They cannot by their hatred, their sin or malice separate us from Him. God will see to it that things come out the way they should. There’s no need, He says, to be defensive.

I was watching a few minutes of the Giants-Eagles game yesterday around the end of the third quarter when Philadelphia started to wrap it up. It is rarely a good idea to play defensively, even if you’re on the defense.

Defensiveness comes naturally to us psychologically. When someone attacks us, or when things go wrong, we want to speak up, defend ourselves and justify our actions. I’ll admit there are times when self-justification seems acceptable. Where a reasonable person opposes you and simply does not have all the facts, you may be able to enlighten them and clear things up. Even then you are ahead if you can avoid sounding like you’re defending yourself. I suppose I really want to be understood so I try to explain why I am following a particular course of action. Still, I see that I could have saved myself a lot of time and trouble -- not to mention some legal entanglements -- by being content to allow other people to think of me what they chose to think (a key point).

If I could be satisfied with simply doing right I would be much more at peace, and that is the point of the instructions Jesus gave us here. Too often I want to do right and get credit for it as well. I want people to recognize how I have solved the problem or how much I have sacrificed to do the right thing. I certainly don’t want to be castigated because those around me are too shallow, too blinded by self-interest, or just too stupid to understand that I did what needed to be done.

The Lord knows this feeling all too well. I don’t know about anyone else, but I sometimes get to thinking that I could do a better job of running things if it were left in my hands. God needs a better PR agency. He needs to advertise His achievements, game the system a little to get some awards and some public recognition. I know there’s a lot going “behind the scenes”. What’s wrong with bring it out front and getting a little exposure? The problem is God seems to get only bad press. Did you ever hear of a hurricane blowing itself out in the mid-Atlantic being called an “act of God”? Are earthquakes that never occur “acts of God”? The Lord needs to get some of those Hollywood agents on His payroll and do a little self-promotion, right?

OK, maybe not. Maybe I should be more like Him – less concerned for credit than for purity, truth, and righteousness. Perhaps I should be willing to trust the One who “sees in secret” to expose things when they need to be revealed. We don’t expect a painter or a sculptor to unveil a half-finished project (sometimes it’s hard to tell). I have to recognize that I have not reached the point in the story where the “reveal” makes sense. The chapter isn’t finished. The book isn’t finished.

Consider this: a funny short guy found a magic ring which he gave to his nephew who threw it into a volcano and saved the world. Is that The Lord of the Rings? Does it seem like something is missing?

I think today I’ll worry less about what those with limited vision think about me and see if I can’t do what pleases the Lord. I’ll trust Him to justify me instead of trying to justify myself. I’ll leave the hidden things alone to be revealed in their time. I might even try to do more that’s just between me and my Father.